Jamaican saying: When you think it’s peace and safety it’s sudden destruction.
We are living in an information society, a digital age where every tap of a key is etched into permanence. Yet, instead of making us more transparent, this hyper-connected world has given rise to a strange, widespread psychological illness: the epidemic of pretentiousness. People have built elaborate, sanitized digital walls to hide behind, painting flawless pictures to impress strangers while burying their true thoughts in the shadows.
The Heavy Toll of Forced Silence
But there is a dangerous irony in trying too hard to stay invisible. In a free society, the freedom to raise our voices, to speak out and up about the horrible realities of our world—from the loss of jobs to the crippling costs of medical bills, medications, food, gas, and rent—carries a cost. Because some onlookers are quick to label any outspoken view as "too militant," many choose absolute silence. They suppress their thoughts, muffle their expressions, and bottle up their genuine anxieties. But human nature cannot tolerate that kind of containment for long. Eventually, when you force yourself to swallow your reality to keep up appearances, you implode. You become an emotional wreck, hazardous to your own well-being.
The Illusion of the Digital Confessional Booth
To escape this mental anguish, people look for a backdoor. This is where the false confidentiality of apps like WhatsApp and Facebook Messenger catches them in a psychological trap. Because these platforms happen away from public viewing, people treat them like a secure confessional booth. They let their guard down, typing out their deepest, darkest secrets, or venting their rawest feelings as if they can confide in a piece of software.
But "encrypted" only means your message is safe while traveling through the air. The moment it lands on someone else’s device, your privacy is completely out of your hands. I have always said that the Bible warns us Jesus shall come like a thief in the night. When that day arrives, a lot of people are going to be caught with their fingers frozen to their keys, desperately trying to hide what they shared in the dark. If night should ever suddenly turn to day on Messenger and WhatsApp, exposing everything hidden behind the screen, many will not be able to look the Father in the face. They will walk straight ahead with their heads bowed in total shame. True integrity means you don’t write in the dark what you are afraid to stand by in the daylight.
Confronting the "Flies on the Wall"
Then, there are the spectators on the outer edge—the "monitoring spirits" and the flies on the wall. These are the friends and acquaintances who quietly stalk your public Facebook page, reading your words and viewing your life, yet refusing to type a single syllable or leave a comment. They act entirely unconcerned online. Yet, the very moment they see you in person, they want to corner you and discuss everything you posted.
That is pure hypocrisy. Why sit there pretending you don't care, only to demand an intimate conversation in private? When people act like that, I refuse to hold a conversation with them. If you cannot stand with me or engage with me in the open digital square, do not expect me to grant you my energy behind closed doors. Even worse are those who try to police others, telling people not to comment on their friends' pages because they are "too opinionated." These silent watchers are never the ones who come up with real-world solutions to situations. Yet, when bolder souls risk the unknown and speak up to make things better, these hypocrites are the first in line to benefit from the progress.
The Cost of a Curated Persona
Ultimately, those who try the hardest to be careful are the ones most likely to trip over their own pretense. Their absolute, unnatural silence causes people to quietly investigate them. When you paint a picture that is too perfect, you don't protect yourself—you transform yourself into a suspect. People begin to wonder if you are truly who you display yourself to be in the public eye, or if you are hiding a wreck behind the facade.
We just need to act normal. We need to stop trying to curate a performance to impress an audience that doesn’t truly care about us. Keep your personal family moments close to your chest for safety, use the broad reach of the public square to stand firmly behind your principles, and speak out against injustice without fear. When you live an upfront, transparent life, you never have to stress about the walls coming down, because you have nothing to hide.
Tah-Tah! View things from different angles to see how they look and feel.
Grace Dunkley-Asphall, Copyright © 2026



